Kody Hanner
Just a cursory statement?
I grew up in a small town in Northern California. For many that aren’t from this region on the United States don’t always realize how rural this region of California can be. The town that I was raised in had about 1500 people and when something went array, I always knew who I could call on.
However, when I ran into neighbors or family friends at the grocery store, the farewell usually consisted of the obligatory “We should get together soon”. Was this a lie? No. It was simply the polite thing to say and possibly even a hope that time would allow for coffee with a friend in our busy schedules. At the end of the day, it was probably a hollow farewell.
Headed North!
My outlook on cursory farewells changed when my family and I relocated to North Idaho. When we first arrived, everyone’s introduction ended with “Let me know how I can help”. So, with my history of hollow farewells, I thought to myself that everyone seemed so nice, but who would show up if we really needed it?
Personally, in my heart, I know that if any of my new friends and acquaintances needed anything we would be there in a heartbeat. That is how we would make for good neighbors, but they didn’t know us from Adam. And we were Californias to boot!
Trouble found us
About 6 months after our arrival to Idaho our lives got turned upside down. I was 33 weeks pregnant with our youngest and my water broke on Valentine’s Day, WHILE at a 4-H meeting. I told one of the other mom’s that I had built a relationship with that something wasn’t right and we took off. As we were loading up in the car, she caught up with us to say, “Let me know how I can help”.
I ended up being ambulanced 3 hours away to the closest Children’s Hospital with a Maturity wing leaving our 5 older kids basically home alone (grandparents came for a while and our oldest was 16) with my husband running back and forth.
Showing their true colors
Within just a few hours of being told that I was stuck in the hospital (for what ended up being 5 weeks with our NICU stay) our community really showed their true colors. That same mom I had confided in at the 4-H meeting had organized a meal train! For 5 weeks, my kids had a hot meal every night and fixings for easy breakfasts and lunch. Each night, whoever came to drop off food would call or text me letting me know that everyone was safe. If was such a relief to just be able to focus on our premature baby.
As money got tight from my husband driving a full day round trip in our suburban, a family from the fire department my husband volunteered with loaned us a little car, cutting our gas bill by 75%! We barely knew these people at this point and they had just handed over the keys, no questions asked. This couple happens to be some of our closest friends here at this point.
Towards the end of our stay in the NICU, there was a terrible windstorm. All of our fences went down, leaving our cows free to wander. There wasn’t a lot we could do except ask our boys to try and figure something out. That is when we received a phone call from my husband’s mother (who was with the kids), that people had shown up with chainsaws and tools to handle our fences because they knew we were gone.
This farewell gives me the chills
Just writing this I begin to tear up and the chills. Honestly, we never asked for our community’s help. They open-heartedly offered with zero expectations!
I knew this was the community I would forever call home. There are many places that I have lived, and I don’t know if I will always live here. But my heart will always belong to this tiny town in the mountains of North Idaho.
A meaningful farewell
Since we came home from the hospital, we have tried to be there for our town in everyway that we can. We donate pork from our farm, we volunteer, and run when we know of someone in need. We have friendships that we know with a drop of a hat either of us would be there for each other and have needed to be a few times. But I know when I see someone at the grocery store and they wave goodbye with a “Let me know if you need anything”, that is a neighbor I know means it.
Moving backward in time
Being there for your community can sometimes be seen as an old-fashioned tradition. But if you didn’t have social media tomorrow, if you didn’t have the whole world at your fingertips, or if you didn’t have access to our expansive supply chain, who would be in your corner?
Want to teach your kids about community and traditions?
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